TO: All Rocket Executives
Greetings my fellow leaders of Team Rocket. I write to you from a location I must keep secret, but I assure you I am planning a glorious and triumphant return as you read this. Like Ho-Oh rising from the ashes, we will return again, more powerful than before. But there is a more pressing matter at hand: a newly discovered rival in the Isshu region, Team Plasma.
Details are scarce about them so far, I can only guess at their intentions at this point. If they are anything like the syndicates of the other regions, this in itself may be cause for concern. The other groups that dare to copy our name have risen to be great threats. Things are not as simple as our initial conquest to control the Kanto region, whereas we sought power through Pokémon and finances, the others over the years have sought goals that seem completely irrational.
Shortly after our defeat in Saffron City, I learned of Team Aqua and Team Magma in the Hoenn region. They were no criminals- they were terrorists. As we worked to assemble technology to create the most powerful Pokémon of all, Team Magma sought to bring an eternal drought upon the world by awakening the legendary Groudon, whilst Team Aqua planned to completely flood it by calling upon the sea god Kyogre. I was terrified to ponder which was worse. I thought to myself, why would one want to gain so much power only to destroy the domain to have power over?
After your failure to succeed in the takeover of the Johto region, I learned of an even more horrifying plot in the Sinnoh region. Team Galactic, a seemingly innocuous energy company, had instigated a plot at the behest of their leader Cyrus to harness the powers of Dialga, Palkia, and Giratina to destroy the very fabric of reality. The idea sickened me- attaining most absolute power only to use that power to tear apart the universe into nothingness. His ambition was great, and yet at the same time his goals horrified even me. These men were brilliant in what they attained, and yet misguided as to how to use it. Team Rocket would have far better uses of such power.
Since learning of Team Plasma, I have struggled to garner any information. My contacts in the Isshu region have only been able to give me photographs of their grunts, and little more. They dress in attire reminiscent of medieval warriors; like a brotherhood of knights temporally misplaced in the modern day. My guess is their goals are set upon the incredible power of the Black Yin and White Yang Pokémon, Zekrom and Reshiram. What they intend to do with such power is beyond me, perhaps they seek to alter the very balance of reality, or to twist it into a new metaphysical order tailored to their own views of how the world should be. The possibilities with such power are endless!
Yet worry not. These Teams have come and gone as fast as their plans are torn apart by ten year old children. Team Rocket will rise again; greater, more powerful, and more feared than any other group on Earth. I have a plan, perhaps my greatest yet, to tilt the balance of the world into the favor of Team Rocket. We will begin soon. There is no time to waste. I will contact you again soon.
This report was written by Giovanni, Gym Leader of Viridian City and Head of Team Rocket. It was most certainly not written by GodofPH, AKA Pat Hessman, who has a blog, Raptor Rants, and has sold his soul to competitive battling by giving into IV breeding.